i will survive.

Thursday, it's a very cold day. My bones begins to ache slowly, whenever I make any kind of small movements. Was awaken by some kind of dim lights and small voices. Eyes opens slowly and the word damn it was the first thing that was in my mind. Because I fell asleep with the television was still on, my controller was dead. So, I had to wake up and off it manually. That sucks, and it was four-forty five in the morning and knowing I had only two hours left to sleep, was very stressful. Because I know, I would end up being lazy. But, guess what, I was wrong. Was a little fresh, but I feel so unhealthy. Thanks to my lazy self, and the not so good weather these days. I've been skipping my daily jogs. Kinda sucks, cause my almost flat stomach is beginning to form into a big zero, once again. Right now, I wanna smile and laugh like an idiotic barbarian. But, the cold is getting the best of me. My joints are beginning to hurt, I feel numb and empty inside.

Oh, I hate waking up early in the morning. Because everyday, I have this feeling, I feel so empty. Like a big hole in me (like there's no organs, and feels like breathing in a huge hole in me), half dead walking with a face that just feel like slapping, music blasting in my ears feels like someone's trying to help me snap out of it, I'm breathing for oxygen cz that's the only way to live and I feel so dead. I hate that, a lot. I don't know if that make sense.

Sigh, maybe someday. Life would turn up great.
I hope tomorrow will be a better day, I need the thickest jacket ever, right now.
Too lazy to move and take my jacket. -shrugs-

"I feel there's a mask on my face, trying to turn into someone I'm always am afraid of becoming.. Is this bad?"