Whoa. So many changes(blogger) and I feel so outdated to be honest.
It's quite embarrassing because that shows how long I've left my blog dead.

Many things have happened. Sad and happy moments. Ups and downs.
Everything's a memory now as I type. Pardon if my grammar is horrible.

Anyways, it's almost October! Time is really rushing its way to 2013.
Well, to me at least. It's almost the end of year and it's stressing me out.
I'm still in the same lifestyle since last year & people have question me.
"Do you want to be stuck like this forever?"
"Are you going to continue study next year?"

Let's be honest, you'll never know what step to take next. Everything's a risk.
But most of the time, you're just pretty much stuck at that situation.
I've made a promise to M and I really hope I'll fulfill it. Or else, it's all disappointments.

I am scared to death. Every time I think about it, I just feel like screaming.
Pull all of my off my head, cry 24/7 and puff everything away with cigarettes.
One after another. Hoping it all go away.. But fat hope.
Times like this, I just feel like going to somewhere nobody knows me but I got to snap into reality.
I just really really wish someone is now here to hold me tight and tell me everything will be okay.
Cheesy but who gives a shit.

Everyday I lose myself. My mood pretty much goes with the flow.
I really need to learn to control my mood swings.

I hope everything will fall apart. Goodnight beautiful world.
xoxo