"When I get mixed feelings, my thoughts go wild. Can't help but feel like so fuckedup"

I hate being confused, I always have this thinking, well more to debating in my own brain whether I hate or love life. But most of the time, I try to think positive. Put a smile across my face and learn to love it, also at the same time, I really hope it will get better. But some things, just lingers. That's memories, which one just can't help but to ponder on it. We all don't mind the goody things, but what about the bitter moments? The ones where, you feel like killing yourself at that point of time and wonder why did it happen to you even though you knew that you won't get any answers..

But sometimes, things just happen. Please invent a machine that could suck out all our pain, cuz it's not needed and all it does it makes us feel so bad. And I, I just can't stop thinking about the sins I've committed (either I realize doing it or not) and can't stop telling myself how stupid I can be by doing it eventhough how know it's wrong. I sense, voices..... Right Niss? No matter how strong you are, you're gonna break down one day too.

Man, sorry for all these crap. I just feel confused.. AND SHIKIN, PLEASE STOP BEING A LAZY FATASS.

On a brighter side (not really), finally bought dylon. Go figure what's that, and can't wait to try it. The bad thing is, for a small portion it's so expensive..... Oh well, hope it's worth every penny :) Anyways, been looking up at elf products for a while. Am really really really tempted, but I shall stay as a goodgirl by not spending money now. Hahahaha, due to something lah. Hate being fickle minded, I better go figure what I really want and purchase it.

Down down down everybody falling down..............